The New Year’s Dilemma

To resolution or not…

It’s that glorious time of year again where we set the big “New Year’s Resolutions.” Let me guess…are we getting in shape this year? Wait no, we are saving money and getting “financially fit”? Or any of the countless other resolutions that feel so promising January 1st and become a distant memory by February.

Let me start by stepping back and saying there is absolutely nothing wrong with setting a resolution or fifty if you want. This is, as always, just a short trip into my personal thoughts on the topic, and how we can try to up the success rate.

Let’s start by asking Why.

Why are you making a resolution? Is it only for the New Year’s post? That person on social media you want to impress? Or is it deeper than that? I think the best question to ask is who is the resolution for? And that answer should always be consistent…YOU. Not for society, not for the glamour of having a resolution, but truly for you.

Let’s think of it this way, if I made my resolutions and goals for 2022 in accordance with society, they would have to be to get married and have kids since I am about ten years past society standards as a 35 year old single woman. I can confidently tell you right now, those are not my resolutions or goals for 2022. It is important that we dig deeper, and truly understand ourselves and what we want from life.

Resolutions fail because we make them just because it’s the New Year, but the New Year isn’t some supernatural event. As a matter of fact on December 31st and January 1st you are still you, and your habits are most likely the same as well. A resolution cannot be successful unless we do more than just write 2022 by the date. We have to change our habits and our mindsets in order to succeed.

But there is so much more. I can’t even begin to explain the full extent of my personal journey the past couple of years. I have been blessed with love and at the same time blessed with loss. I have found peace and at times chaos, hurt but also happiness. But the common thread through it all was change, life is constantly flowing and changing which is exactly what we need to be along with our resolutions.

Liquid and adaptable.

It is the idea of impermanence that makes adaptability so important, and not just the thought that both good and bad times don’t last forever, but that life as a whole is temporary. 2020 was life changing for so many people in so many different ways. It showed us just how fleeting and superficial much of what we strive for can be. Whether it is money, status, that ideal physique, etc. it all can be gone in the blink of an eye.

Just imagine if your 2020 resolution was to travel the world? That worked out well, right? A worldwide pandemic was not something any of us could have imagined, but the main question in all of this is when that resolution failed because the world literally shut down, did we adjust and make a new one? Did we adapt and change course to still succeed in another way in 2020? Or did we just let the year go by without adapting to the new world order?

The main point through it all is to get what we want from life, we have to ask the right questions and be adaptable. We have to be willing to navigate the twists and turns that come with each and every day while still living for ourselves, our true selves. And of course to live for ourselves we have to know ourselves.

Take the time to find and create yourself. Trust me, those resolutions may actually have a chance if you do.

Love always.

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